At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize