Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize