just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
