and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You're a waste of cheezeits
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
