somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
