Bisexual people are plain selfish.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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