you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
