I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize