I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Randomize