Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize