dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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