Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
