guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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