using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
