YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
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