he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I still have a little drunk in my system
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
