Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
North Korea, Best Korea!
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
