he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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