oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
