Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
