He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
