Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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