I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
