i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
