id be glad to
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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