Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
