the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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