Sponge bath it is.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
