She's JV to your varsity
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
