D3 body, D1 cock
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
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