How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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