It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
i think im in europe. pls send help
Dick very happy bro
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize