Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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