Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
