What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
We are two peas in an std pod
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Randomize
