Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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