Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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