I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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