I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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