I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
