i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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