My first STD was from a foam party
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
