im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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