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Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
