nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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