who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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