Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
