god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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