yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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