Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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